Episode 25: Make Sure you’re on Rock and not Sand

The following program is sponsored by evangelical life

Ministries. Welcome to engaging truth, the manifestation of God's word and the lives of people around us. Join us each week. As we explore the impact of his message of spiritual renewal from the lesson of forgiveness, forwards them, the crucible of divorce to the message of salvation learn earned by an executioner from a condemned killer to the gift of freedom found in the rescue of victims of human trafficking. This is God's truth in action.

Welcome to engaging truth. This is your host for this evening's program. Dave Schultz from evangelical life ministries, the mother of what we do here every Sunday night on engaging truth. Our guests for this evening, uh, will be on during the course of the month of, of February, which is Valentine's month. And we're gonna focus upon not self-indulgent love, which is the love in which we live today, but self, um, self-giving love self-motivated by the gospel of Christ. And so we welcome to the mics this evening, Mike and his wife, Liz. Welcome. Hello. Thank

You. Glad to be here.

We're gonna base what we are thinking on first Corinthians chapter 13. Let me just read those few verses because it talks about what love looks like. Love is patient love is kind love, does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant. It's not rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irres resentful or re unreachable. If there's not rejoice in wrong doings, but rejoices in truth, love hears all things. Believes all things, hopes, all things, endures, all things love, never ends. I like that. Middle one, if the does not insist on its own way, that's the indulgent life in which we live today. Michael, you've got a family, a family that you were probably thinking about long before the girls that you have. Tell me something about your family. Oh

Yes. Uh, so we have three little girls and my wife and my wife always jokes that, uh, she has to import men into her family. So she's got two sisters, both of which have nothing but little girls. Uh, after Lily came along my middle child, we thought we would try one more time for a boy. And we ended up getting another girl. So lo and behold, our whole way is nothing but, but little girls. So now

Too, both kids and grandkids and great-grandkids all girls except for one. Oh, wow.

Go ahead. so now I know what it's like to live in a girl's dormitory. See? So uh, but Ashlyn is 16. She's driving now. We just got her, uh, an automobile and, uh, she's uh, very active with cheerleading. She also likes softball. Lily is 13. She's a horse riding fanatic. We still will have a horse for her. She's she's riding, um, frequently. And then Hannah is 10 and Hannah's our little artist. She can just about draw anything. I mean, I can draw a, a pretty good stick figure, but this girl at 10 can, can just outdo me like hands down. So, um, they're all did in their own unique way. Um, but it's truly a joy to, to raise those, those children and watch them progress and grow. Which one is gonna be a boy. I think Hannah's gonna be the tomboy. Hannah already is the Tom boy. Okay. Liz, you thought about a family long before you were married. You say maybe one day, God will give me the opportunity to have a family. Uh, and you probably thought they would be much alike if you had them, both boys and girls. How are the girls different from each other? They

Are very, very, very different. And I know, um, once our second Lily came along, I honestly thought, well, what's wrong? What is wrong? This child is so different. And eventually after making several trips to the pediatrician, he said, well, um, I think it's time to just realize this one is, uh, cut from a separate cloth. And so, um, they are very much Ashlyn. Um, our oldest, as Michael said, uh, you know, she was the first grandchild. She was the first baby in the family. Um, and she was very, very quiet even, um, as a baby, she would wake up in the morning and just co and laugh. And so we'd have to make sure we went in, um, to get her out of bed. She would never cry um, but it's still very much the same way. She's very sweet and serious and wise, um, and has such a heart for her family.

Um, but then Lily came along and she is a force to be reckoned with. She, uh, she really is. She's fearless driven. Uh, you know, like Michael said, she can go out and ride into these arenas on a, in a national championship without hesitation, um, and, and just shine, which is so different from myself. I really envy and admire that about her. Um, but you know, that's challenging at times to parent, but, um, she's just magnificent. And then Hannah, who's our little wild child. She is, uh, a person herself and wears it with pride and very creative. You never know what she's gonna do next, very funny and artistic. So coming from

The same mother and the same father, you'd think they'd be the same, but they age, they all together different. The describe for me best you can, as I read first Corinthians 13, what self sacrificial love means in light of this month that we're in Valentine's

Month? Um, I know for me, I had an amazing example of what that looked like from my grandmother, um, who just past last year. Um, but she was such a powerful example, um, of faith, you know, she would pray in all things and her whole life was about her family and about all of us, she raised four generations over 20, um, between her daughters and grandchildren and great-grandchildren. And, um, she was always just quietly in the background serving the family cooking Sunday afternoon dinners after church. And, um, she was always sewing something for someone or, um, always there for every event. And, um, you know, even when her health began to decline, um, you know, we, uh, my sister and my mom and aunt and I were, um, always switching out, staying with her in the hospital. And, um, in those moments it was the hardest time our family's gone through, but we were always there and it was some of the sweetest moments that we'd had together.

Um, and they really transcended that, um, that tragedy. But, um, she raised us all to know what loving each other really meant, and that was serving your family. She raised us to be good mothers, to lovingly admonish our children when it was necessary and speak truth, um, to each other and our children and our spouses. And, um, and that was her beautiful legacy. Um, you know, and it wasn't a great huge bank account or cars or a huge house. It was, um, being a loving sacrificial Christian woman. And there are 20 souls now that go on to do the same from her example, Michael

You're a dad, you're a loving dad, you're a Christian dad. How do you apply that at self sacrificial love that you know, about not to the business world, but to the small gathering of family Christ came down from heaven. He could have sat on his throne in heaven

And ruled over everyone, but he came down to earth and paid the ultimate sacrifice so that we could all be free of our sins. And, you know, he died on a cross. And so I don't know that me as a dad, I mean, that's the way I look at my children, uh, on a daily basis if, uh, one of them were to run out in the street and a bus was coming, I would, I would, I know I would, you know, push them out of the way and, and take the hit for my kids. And so Christ has modeled that, that level of, of sacrifice for us. And I feel it's incumbent on, on me as a father , uh, to do the same for, for my children to, at that at that level. Um, am I always perfect? No, uh, we we're, we live in a sinful broken world. We're, we're all fallen human beings, um, but Christ modeled that, that level of sacrificial law of for us. And so that's what I strive for in my walk and in, in my parenthood. And really in, in our relationship as with spouses,

What surrounds your girls in the secular world is we live in a time of, of entitlement. Um, in other words, you deserve this. How do you battle with this, knowing that you come from just a whole different point of view

For me and my walk, I know early on in our marriage, when our children were very, very young, uh, um, we struggled financially. We, we, we were, we were not blessed with a lot of material, uh, items at that point, oh, by the way, join the world. Yeah. we, you know, it was a real struggle. It was a sacrifice, you know, it was a sacrifice to start a small business and to start a family. Um, and I, and I can remember putting a lot of things on the back burner that I, that I wanted. And I just made a commitment early, early on in our marriage and our, and in our parenthood to, to do everything that I could and work as hard as I could to, to build something so that I could to build a legacy so that I could, um, pass those blessings onto my children and, and provide for my children.

And I feel like that is my job as a father is to provide for my family. And so I can remember at one point, um, we had a, a very old car that, that was our steering went out and there was, you know, quite a number of things wrong with it. Um, I could have at that point, probably gone out and bought a new car ahead ahead of my wife or, you know, and, and other things. But I, I continued to drive that car and I made the sacrifice to buy Elizabeth a new, a new car that where she could cart the girls around. And, and so that's just a, a small example of, of that sacrificial mentality.

How about you there's any thoughts on this? Do we live in a time of, and as the kids hear this all the time, you're entitled to the best, how do you deal with it?

And, um, it was a powerful time, uh, that reminded all of us and us as a family, uh, to really come together and spend that time together, um, and, uh, you know, really grow, um, in that bond and understand that we had, we had the rock to stand on and, uh, watching all of the examples of crumbling lives and, uh, a lot of rioting and, uh, and civil unrest happening, um, and, and share with them that, you know, a lot of that may possibly be because, uh, people were, you know, relying on the wrong things and that's what happens. And so I think, uh, you know, they've gotten the example from us, but certainly they've seen that unravel in the world. And that's been powerful too. That is

Example, um, um, one of my kids the other day said, oh, that why don't you get a new car? I said, the old ones run just fine. And there are no car payments, no high insurance. And if one happens to be crunched somewhere, that's okay.

Soren. It's okay.

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Uh, we are very much faced with that now with, uh, sophomore high school and it, uh, daughter about to go into ninth grade. Um, and you know, my heart's been on that and I've begun, praying a lot out about that because as challenging as a lot of our moments have been, I realize the hardest time is coming when we set them out into the world and we can't be there. Um, you know, when every single little thing hits. And so, um, I think just really focusing on making sure when they come home with one issue or other, or they recognize, um, brokenness around them, uh, you know, issues at school, other friends, having problems at home, um, reinforcing in them, um, that at the end of the day, our faith and our family and the strength and love we give each other is the most important thing. And if we don't walk in the way that God's instructed us and get off that path, that's when things go terribly wrong. So we just hope that we set them out there with, uh, you know, God's word and the best instruction we can, and maybe they'll wander on the right path again, if they stray a bit. But, uh, a lot of prayer, a lot of prayer

Who is the tough one in the family of husband and wife. I mean, I think I know, but Michael, who is it?

The tough one? I would say it's probably me. uh, yeah, I would say, um, in, in certain aspects, we, we compliment each other very, very well. We're very, very different and many, many respects. And I think that those is really compliment each other, um, our core beliefs and our foundation in Christ and our, um, and, and, and our, um, way in which we, we, we put our faith in our, and, and put Christ at the center of a relationship is unwavering. And that, that doesn't change, but we're very different in many, many ways, that's for sure

Who can be toughest on the

Children. Oh, that's me for certain, I think, especially because they're all three girls, you know, uh, Michael very much, you know, gets his moment in the son, but, um, , uh, as an oldest of three girls myself and knowing, uh, knowing how to navigate all of those issues between girls, you know, I usually tend to, uh, you know, put things in their place pretty quickly and call them on, you know, uh, redirecting themselves when, you know, there's arguments or she's stole my letter or, uh, you know, being nasty with each other. I usually tend to, uh, be bad cop in those moments. And he, uh, he certainly has his, uh, little girls who love him. So we kind of tend to balance that a bit too.

I can empathize A favorite Onna or personality of mine that I listen to periodically begins this program all the time. You've just finished your part-time job, and you're going to your full-time job. He's saying your part-time job is what you do in the world. And your full-time job is what you do at home. Michael, do you wanna comment on that? Is there reality to that? Is there truism to that?

Absolutely. There is, uh, you know, you're at work for eight hours a and then your home on the weekends and at night, and, um, our first responsibility more than more so than anything else is to raise our family, to raise our children, uh, the way that, uh, we, we want them to, to be in this world. And so, um, yeah, absolutely. I believe that wholeheartedly,

When you see around the corner about what the future's gonna bring, um, we may have another, um, we may have another year in the future, like 20, 20, um, but it of course will be different. How do you, how do you, um, um, internalize this for yourself to be able to share with your girls, that preparation for the future is terribly important, and that's why you have Jesus every Sunday or every week, every day. That's

Right. We we've really tried to, to instill in our that, you know, life is unpredictable, uh, bad things happen, it's messy. So having Christ at the center of your life and trusting in God is all, all that we have. That's, that's our hope. That's where we get our peace and our joy. And I, and, and we have to instill that in our too,

And coming from you on that.

Well, and I think I know what I try to really, um, drive home with the girls is that, um, part of that walk also, and what keeps us, um, afloat is, is to be there for each other and to live, um, live in service, not only to our families, but those around us. Um, you know, when you're focusing on, um, doing for others and loving, um, those around you and supporting them, um, you have a lot less time to worry, you know, you're lot less worried about me. Um, and, um, that's what creates strength, um, in yourself, I think very much so, um, which is contradictory to what the world tells us. You know, if you're living in service for others, putting yourself aside for others, you're weak or you're, you know, simple. But, um, you know, I know I've seen by example, um, in my family, um, and have learned that, um, when I feel strongest is when I am, uh, focused on, on doing for my family, doing for my daughters, um, you know, and, and focusing on those things and not, um, myself. And so, uh, really doing that and keeping, um, myself in the word and in prayer, um, keeps me balanced and centered. And, uh, that's what I hope our girls see because the world, you never know what's gonna happen next.

Thank you, Liz. And thank you, Michael, for being with us. Would you join us again next Sunday night on engaging truth where Jesus is alive in the voices of those who are interviewed goodnight. And thank you.

Thank you for listening to this broadcast of engaging truth. Be sure to join us each week at this time, to help support our ministry, contact evangelical life ministries, post office box 5 68, Cypress, Texas 77, 410, or visit our website@elmhouston.org, or find us on Facebook at evangelical life ministries. Thank you.